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Do you know that moment when someone asks how you are, and “fine” is already out of your mouth before you have considered the question?
You might be tired. You might want some quiet. You might have something to say and no idea where to begin. None of those possibilities needs to become a dramatic confession. But you can give yourself enough time to notice which answer is true.
An honest answer can be small. “I need a moment to think.” “I'm tired today.” “Something has been on my mind.” You can decide how much to share and who you want to share it with.
In The Purpose Path, we begin with an honest look at where you are. Before changing anything, there is a question worth staying with: what am I pretending is fine when it isn't?
You do not have to answer that about your whole life at once.
Look at one part of your life
The first week's Wheel of Life practice looks at eight areas: health, relationships, work, money, purpose, growth, fun and home. Each gets a score from one to ten, followed by one sentence explaining the number.
The sentence matters. It gives the number some meaning. A job might look impressive while leaving little room for the life you want. A quiet afternoon might matter more to you than something that looks better in a photograph.
Choose one area today. Write what is working, then write what you would like to acknowledge. Keep it specific. An answer about this week is enough to begin with.
You can appreciate something and still want part of it to change. Gratitude does not require you to edit out every difficulty.
Notice the role you step into
Later in the course, we look at identity through the roles you have taken on. The helper. The responsible one. The person who has the answer.
You might value a role and still want a little more freedom within it. Being helpful does not mean you can never ask for help. Being reliable does not require you to have an answer before you have understood the question.
Write down one role that feels familiar. What do you value about it? What does it cost you? What would you like someone to understand about you beyond that role?
These are questions to explore. There is no need to decide that every role is false or that your whole life needs replacing.
Give your own answer some room
The body scan in week four asks you to notice sensations without immediately changing them. You can bring that same attention to an ordinary check-in with yourself. What do you notice? Where do you feel it? What words would describe it?
Then consider what you actually want. Rest, a conversation, a clearer boundary, time to make a decision. Choose something concrete enough to recognize.
You can keep the first answer private. Write it down before deciding what to do with it. Honesty with yourself does not require immediate disclosure to everyone else.
What is one thing you would like to answer more honestly this week?
<h3>Listen to The Purpose Path Podcast</h3><div style="position:relative;padding-top:56.25%;"><iframe src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/UQMreB557H4" style="position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;border:0;border-radius:12px;" allowfullscreen loading="lazy"></iframe></div>
More episodes and free resources: <a href="https://www.chenzoholisticcoaching.com/en/the-purpose-path-podcast">The Purpose Path Podcast</a> and <a href="https://www.chenzoholisticcoaching.com">chenzoholisticcoaching.com</a>.
With love, Chenzo Holistic Coaching Founder of The Purpose Path Podcast

Do you know that moment when someone asks how you are, and “fine” is already out of your mouth before you have considered the question?

How to Stop Saying Everything Is Fine When It Isn't

Read essays on somatic healing, emotional trauma, sensitivity, and finding purpose. Written by Chenzo, holistic coach, empathic healer, tarot reader, and founder of The Purpose Path Podcast. New posts weekly.


Chenzo Holistic Coaching Blog: Somatic Healing, Sensitivity & Purpose

Read essays on somatic healing, emotional trauma, sensitivity, and finding purpose. Written by Chenzo, holistic coach, empathic healer, tarot reader, and founder of The Purpose Path Podcast. New posts weekly.

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How to Stop Saying Everything Is Fine When It Isn't

How to Stop Saying Everything Is Fine When It Isn't

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